Confession & Other Religious Ramblings

First off….my confession.  It’s been almost 9 months since my last post.  What!?  Perhaps that is why my crazy is snaking it’s way back in to my life.  My writing is often an outlet that is not unlike a pressure valve.  Pouring my thoughts out on to paper, er, well, screen, I guess, releases some of the stuff rumbling around up in that noggin’ of mine and allows room for other stuff.  When I neglect to throw stuff out, the pressure builds.  Shame on me for being so neglectful.  I blame grad school.

That said, as I was school supply shopping with my favorite boy this morning, he was, as always, full of interesting questions.  This morning’s car ride home from Target focused on death.  Or I guess, in Cooper’s thoughts, the lack thereof.  This morning my boy told me that we never die, we just get so old that we go somewhere else to hang out.  I like that.  He proceeded to tell me that we start out in heaven, we come here for a while, and then we return to heaven.  I like that too.  Weird how easy it is to find comfort in a 6 year old’s perspective sometimes.

Anyway, he then asked me what heaven looks like.  I told him I don’t know because I’ve never been there…which didn’t jive with what he’d just told me about how we all come from there, so he corrected me and said “You mean you don’t remember.”  Possibly, my boy…possibly.  So I told him that I think it’s too pretty for us to even understand, to which he told me, “Yeah…I think you’re right.  I’m pretty sure there is tons of super green grass and roses everywhere.”  I think I like his picture of it.

What was weird was that while he was telling me this, I thought to myself “I sorta dig pretty, lush grass and roses…that’s cool”, but it wouldn’t be what I would visualize if I were to paint my own picture of heaven.  Then I thought to myself, “but if that’s his picture of heaven and that’s where he’s going….then I’m happy to give up my picture of heaven and join him in his.”  I’m thinking lots of parents would share my sentiment.  It’s sort of what we all do as parents, isn’t it?  We happily give up our own visions, if even for a time, and join along on our little one’s path for a while.  I’m so lucky to be on his….

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